My top Core Value is Spirituality so words like soul and soulful are part of my every day vocabulary. The most horrendous time in my illness was when I felt I had lost my connection to God (whatever that word may mean to you). To me, it was the darkest part of my journey and I cried out on more than one occasion "Father, why has thou forsaken me!" but in far less elegant language I can tell you....
I now know that this painful and -Thank God - temporary (18 months) separation from my soul connection was an indispensable part of my journey. I was left with my body and little else. Worse than that, I was left with a body that wasn't working properly. My brain had gone awry and my body had practically shut down; but at least it was still there.
As time went on, I started feeling my body instead of just knowing that it was there. It is as if my 'dark night of the soul' had allowed a 'new dawn' for my body. I noticed that I was still breathing (even if my breathing was laboured, which it still is sometimes), I was still seeing (even if light hurt my eyes), I was still tasting (even if normal food became far too 'strong'), I was still smelling (even if ordinary smells became unpleasant), and my sense of touch was still functioning (even if the shower felt like needles on my skin). I have written before about my being a Physical Idiot and I meant it.
Until now, I'd only had two body models to choose from:
- The body-as-a-machine school of thought. I had to beat my body into submission or else!
- The body-as-an-astral-entity school of thought. I had to adhere to some airy-fairy type of belief system or else...
I tried both and I liked neither. There was also the body-as-unnecessary luggage (the guru sitting on top of the mountain) and the body-as-the-root-of-all-evil (flagellation, crucifixion, et al). I didn't bother to try those two...
Bringing together my Tips Nos 2 and 3 leads me to recognise that:
- My physical life has been a long history of pain, starting when I was a baby
- As a consequence, I haven't thought about 'being in my body' as a picnic in the park, and I have subconsciously done everything I could to stay focused on my spirit and on my soul in order to escape the physical pain.
My segregation approach has eventually and inevitably let me down. This is what I am learning:
- Whilst I am in this physical form in this dimension (sorry, it's all that quantum physics stuff that I read....), I am my body. Not just my body, but my body just the same. Would you believe that it has taken me over half a century to get to something that is blindingly obvious to most people!
- There is nothing 'airy-fairy' about feeling my body. In fact, the reverse is true. Feeling my body and being aware of the various sensations it communicates to me is extremely 'down to earth' (the language delights me here).
- Part of what I know about who I am is rooted in my body, just as a tree is rooted in the earth. After all, I have never floated around the place...
- When I engage my body in my understanding and my searching, I become an Integrated human being using integrated intelligence - both in the sense of information and insight.
I wonder whether 'body coaching' is not an area that needs to be added to the coaching curriculum. They say intelligence is in the brain but wisdom is in the body - tapping into a person's inherent wisdom is very much what coaching is about.
When we speak with our clients, and more so when we listen to them, I have a hunch that listening to what their body is telling them might be very useful to those clients who, like me, have become 'body-deaf' over the years. Having said that, I also recognise that the language we use for this purpose needs to be the professional language of coaching. It seems to me there is a whole new chapter in the Coaching Bible that is 'aching' to be written.
What do YOU think?
My dearest one, this is really excellent stuff, I am wondering whether there would not be mileage in writing a whole book on this. As I was reading this tip I felt you really had only minutely skimmed the surface in fact hardly at all. It is so good when people realise that their mind, body and soul are in fact one and when one goes awry we need to listen to it as it has clues for the other two parts. Being the spiritual person I am I also liken these three to God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit, and I have often wondered which member of the Trinity represented which part of us humans.
Anyway, this is my offering humble though it is for this tip as it really spoke to me.
LOL
XXX
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and your vulnerability - as ever you are an inspiration in this!
As a coach, I have been fascinated for some time now about working with information that comes from the four energy 'bodies'; physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. I coach executives and for the most part I find we are conditioned to give most value to the information we receive from our mental energy 'body'. Perhaps with the advent of Emotional Intelligence in Leadership, we are becoming more cognisant of allowing the emotional domain some greater freedom of expression (as long as it's done in a controlled way!) Still some work to do here, I think! However, experience also suggests spiritual and physical energy 'bodies' are the most frequently ignored.
From a coaching perspective, I feel that the physical body has much to contribute to the coaching conversation. Symbolic Modelling specifically tunes us in as coaches to understanding that physical 'tics' and subconscious mannerisms can be explored directly and consciously and, I find, often encode fascinating information. Conversely, I also find that moving the body in coaching, in enacting for example, frees up thinking and allows us to access new insights that were not available to us through pure dialogue.
Thanks for stimulating the thinking!
Sarah
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