Update 2024

It is now January 2024 and I have just celebrated my 73rd birthday. In many ways this is depressing and I have to make a conscious effort not to fall into the trap of feeling sorry for myself.

If I ask myself 'what have I got to look forward to in the coming months', my honest answer is 'more of the same': daily medication with daily headaches, monthly ECT (electro-convulsive therapy). 

That is true of course but I must not allow this to 'blind' me to all the things I am grateful for:

• A roof over my head, food on my plate, clothes on my back, warmth in my home, enough money in my bank (unfortunately so many people are not as lucky as I am)
• A physical body that is able and healthy
• A loving supportive husband, who plays such a crucial part in keeping me alive
• A loving son and grandchildren, who play such an important part in my being able to view the future with a smile on my face
• A loving brother who understands the limitations imposed upon me by my BPD and who encourages me without judgement
• Good friends, in person and online, who encourage me and stretch my world beyond the confines of my mental illness.

Just writing the above list makes me feel better. It just goes to show how important and powerful writing our thoughts and feelings can be for us (SEE also '10 Years On - Work & Charitable Organisations').

Focusing on the things we are grateful for isn't an exercise in supeficial 'postive thinking' - it changes the lens through which we view our illness and our life. When we alter our perception we change our experience, and when we change our experience we diminish the impact our illness has on us, if only just for a little while.Those 'little whiles' give us a welcome healing break from the stress of living in Bi-Polar Land :0)